THE ONE WITH NO TITLE
I've had more sleep this week than the past month put together I think (just so it doesn't sound too exaggerated). I don't know if I can solely blame it on the meds I've been taking. I think it's partially just me and my body, recovering and such. But it was a good week spent for the most part asleep in bed. My eyebags are disappearing, the muse would be so proud. This time around I'm blogging as a way to motivate myself to do things. See I told myself this morning, if I can put my mind to doing something and I eventually get down to doing it, I can motivate myself to do other things. So I start small. Very small really. I told myself I'd get out of bed.. and I did. This small steps took me quite far... till now.. I told myself I'm going to blog an entry and when that's done I can study. Since I've done so well I don't see why I should stop now. Do you? Exactly. No.
My head is full of thoughts bout the muse atm. It's sad really. Must.. try.. and.. focus.. Must.. FOCUS. Oh well this entry didn't make much sense but I did it. Waiting for the muse to call me back... should I do laundry? clean room? ok ok back on track.. study..
THE ONE WITH THE (chocolate) CAKE
Sairz and I planned a pot luck which happened yesterday night. It was awesome fun. Although in the planning stages we totally forgot that I had to work, like I usually do most Saturdays (god knows how I can forget). Knocked off from work at 6 and got home by 20 to, bearing in mind that the shindig was happening at 8. When to the little shop to get the quickie ingredients and we baked, me in my work clothes and all. Sarah did a gorgeous carrot cake complete with cream cheese icing and I used her quick chocolate cake recipe topped with icing (that I actually made!!!). The result was stunning, especially since I'm really useless at anything domestic.
The turn out was good. We had good food and lots of good laughs. Best bit was the icing fight. Hard to say if it was me or Sairz who won. She had icing all over her shirt and I had most on my face and hair. I think pot luck should be a common event now. As usual us girls will provide dessert I think.
On a more un-fun note, I've got assignments that I really have to get on to. I really must do it because I want to. So till then I shall be goin to talk to my muse. Only 18 more days till I see him =)
THE ONE WITH THE NEW SPACE
Not new space as in blog space but I've moved to a new room a coupla floors up. Been in this much larger space (as compared to the comfy shoebox that was my room last yr) for almost half the year now. It's starting to look more and more like my own room i.e. messy . Not quite ok, someone told me it's not messy but it's set up to be very homely and inviting. So there. NOT MESSY!!
In other news, other things in life has been progressing quite alright. A little off here and there sometimes but I spose quoting Sinatra when I heard him at work, that's life. Although I just find it frustrating that sometimes you manage to sew up or fix an area of your life only to have another part pulled apart. Like trying to fix up a teddy bear, tug it a lil to sew it up, you're pulling the other half open. Maybe not a good analogy but you get my point. I get anxious very easily now and not being very good at prioritizing it makes the situation worse sometimes what with all the assignments and other things that has to be done. But that's a story for another time when I'm more ready to talk bout it I spose.
My new muse is at work and it's getting shitty that I can't ring coz of that. I wanna go for a run but I'm glued to my chair. I do need a clear head so I just might move in a bit. Otherwise unclear head = jumbled up thoughts in essays... yes essayS. More than 1. I better do it before the muse gets annoyed and before I run the risk of .. well shall not say it.. let's not jinx me shall we? Have a good time hopefully I'll update more. I miss this space.
THE ONE WITH THE GREAT IMPROVEMENT
You can actually see the floor in my room now. No more suitcase and piles of clothes lying around. Everything is kept, no wait lemme rephrase that, everything's NEATLY kept in my closet either folded or hung. I threw out heaps of my clothes yet my closet's still piled high but at least it's neat and oragnised. That's an achievement I tell ya. In the spirit of Eid I thought I'd better get my act together and clean up my mess. Coz if I'm celebrating at home, that's what I'd be doing in the week before raya, slowly cleanin up my mess in time to celebrate. So since I'm here alone and there's no one to nag at me to do it, I think I'd nag myself and put in the effort. I feel so grown up lol... a lil too late to say that.. I am already grown up :s so tidak malus hehe..
Anyway the main thing is my room's heaps neater since ppl last saw it but there're still a few knick knacks and books lying around that needs to be organised and arranged and dishes to be done. So yeah .... then I'll prolly get it feng shui-ed lol (if that's the right way of using that word). Move my bed around a lil bit. See how things go... my room's kinda smaller than the one back home so yeah.. I have to make do with what I have and when I'm done I'll put up pics. Damn should've taken the before shot so that u can see the HUGE difference in the after.
So yes the few knick knacks are not gonna move themselves so Imma go and do that. Will update more soon I hope. See ya.
THE ONE WITH THE MESSY ROOM
Let's face is... what's new with me and a messy room? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. I still have my suitcase from when I came back from home. Yes the suitcase is still very much unpacked and lying on the floor. Thank god mum did my laundry before dad and me packed my bag. Other than that clothes have started to pile all over the suitcase and chair, my fridge hasn't been cleaned out (hence the lack of food coz I do not intend to stock up on groceries if I have to place them in the communal fridges coz I simply cbf to go down or out of my room to get them if the need arises), my laundry bag has still got clean laundry in it from before I left for home (meaning the dirty stuff is the one all over the room, i know... *EEWWWWW*) and shoes.. omg the ginormous amount of shoes that I have managed to collect lately is slowly taking up space of my already small room. I think I really have to get rid of some that I came with. Just a problem of which. Storage is such a headache. I wouldn't really have thought about cleaning my room if it wasn't for the fact that the stupid lock on my door wouldn't work. I went to the front desk to change my key twice today and the stupid thing wouldn't budge. Tomorrow I so do not want the people who work on the lock to see what a messy person I am. So yeah that should get me started on the cleaning..... in a lil bit I'll definitely get to it...
What else have I put on hold aside from the whole domestic chores... assignments and the sorting of notes.. meh... at least those are doable... I'd be more willing to do that than the cleaning that I have to do.. then again I really crave the neat room that I had before I left for Singapore. The slob that I am didn't make that last very long. BOO! My to do list at the moment:
8 is an ok number. I can handle eight. Especially if I can get number 1 done. All else should fall into place easily.. well here's the problem.. gettin number 1 done :P. GO SHARKIE GO!!
On a happier note I'm gettin my taxes back... muahahahahaah!! MORE SHOES!! Nah jus kiddin, maybe :P But anyhows that's good to cover phone bills and my every other need I spose. I'm feeling better and better these days. So I spose other things are just good starts. I need to get the Sharkie train running faster again. I spose that's it. Gotta try and clean room.. MUST... CLEAN... ROOM!!
my room in its glory days
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Signing off,
Sharkie (a very stunned lookin one in that pic lol thanks dylan)
THE ONE AT SUB ZERO
I'm friggin freezin my a** off here. I've also just discovered that my wednesdays would mean 9am STAT lectures, a very long and exhausting 3 hour gap and then two hour long lectures after, but they're in the same slot. YES you read it right I have a clash and to make things even better/worse they're the supposed modules for my majors. I foresee very long and boring wed just me and my laptop doin our thing at the refactory... fark. STAT 1008.. seriously what was I thinkin?
I feel like I'm dying a little more inside. I keep thinking of ways to revive myself, and I do it... if only for the short term gain. Then I'm back to square one. Today hasn't been any better. I was sorta snubbed by someone's significant other heh RUDE CAN? ... it's been ages I don't have his number and I've moved on plus I don't think I ever cared for him as much as I did well .. yeah as much.
I need a direction, a goal, something to keep me occupied something to achieve and most of all I need reassurance. I'm lost as always in most posts.. I'm always lost .. this time I dunno prolly much worse. 'Specially when I feel like I lost something truly important, something I cared about and was and still am willing to sacrifice for. Drop of a hat I would. But life is such. Somethings are worth the wait, but I don't know I think I've waited long enough, I'm wasting away.
Blogging is spose to distract me from the above 'condition' so moving on... gawd can this place get any colder!!! I think I need to set goals for myself .. yes I should. No running away from it this time. I've gotta stick it. Keeps me occupied plus works out for a better me. Just the inspiration is gone. It's just me now. No one else. It has always been just me cept previously the added support was comfortable, something I got used to, something I yearn and wish I could have back.. well maybe... if it's my boomerang, it's my boomerang nothing can throw it off course. Right then.. back to makin plans for me... I cant wait to go home again .. meh
THE ONE WITH MOVING ON
The tub was empty, she sat there alone occasionally tasting the salt that passes her lips. The water from the overhead shower continues to rain down like the million things that constantly drown her thoughts. Her wet face showing the signs of the many sleepless nights and the confusion playing on her mind. The constant patter of the water against the white tub slowly calms her. Lost somewhere between reality and what she hopes for. All cried out, she stood up, a shower would do her good.